My Back Hurts

When I was a kid I was skinny.  Honest.  I gained some weight when I went to college but not an inordinate amount.  When I shipped off to graduate school, on the other hand, I gained a LOT of weight -- without quite noticing what was going on.  My graduate school years were emotionally trying in many ways; I spent two years studying sociolinguistics at the University of Texas, Austin and managed not to get any degree.  In the final days of my emotional decline, during a vacation break when the campus was almost empty, I hurt my back. 

I didn't realize until much later that it was my back that was damaged because the pain manifested itself in my left leg.  In fact what had happened, as best as I can reconstruct it, was that I had absent-mindedly stepped off a curb which was about nine inches higher than the street and came down hard, with all my newly-acquired weight on my left leg, herniating a disk in my lower back.  I don't think I felt any pain until some time later and I don't think I sought medical attention until the campus infirmary re-opened after the break.  In the meantime, I sort of limped around, convinced that there was something wrong with my leg.

The University of Texas at Austin had (and probably still has) orthopedists in their infirmary because their football team was so important.  I therefore got expert attention, was properly diagnosed immediately, prescribed painkillers and muscle-relaxants...and couldn't really properly sit through a seminar for a couple of months.  After a few  return visits to the infirmary I was taught back exercises which, I was told, would more or less keep my back in line.

I left Austin, returned to New York, got a job, kept up with the exercises and my back remained functional (although far from pain-free) for many years.  Every so often I would have episodes that would put me in bed for a couple of days, applying heat until I could stand up straight and walk again, but these were relatively infrequent.  In the early 90's, however, I managed to do something to my back that made it kept feeling worse until I could not even roll over in bed.  I could not stand up.  I could barely move.  Excruciating pain shot through me if I attempted to bend to reach for something.  We consulted with a doctor, an ambulance was called, and emergency surgery was arranged.

The surgery improved things immensely.  With exercise, my back was much better -- freer than it had been from pain since I had left Austin.  It remained so for many years until, a few years ago, I began having episodes, once again, that confined me to be for a day or two, applying heat, until I could walk again.  Finally, about a month ago, I was out for almost a week.  My back has not been quite right since -- it almost endangered my trip out to Oberlin to see my son perform.  I have been limited in my ability to sit up all this long weekend.  It is worrisome.

It is dissapointing because over the last twenty months I've lost about thirty-five pounds (in part) to ease the pressure on my back.  I still expect to lose more, I'm not deterred, but I could have hoped to have seen a better interim result than this.